About 14 years when we started the Shidduch Group we had no idea the value of this dynamic. We thought we would trade resumes. Shortly after we started, someone suggested we all say each others childrens' names by Friday night candle lighting. So we did. That felt good. It was more than feeling others were davening for my children. It was now being linked spiritually to each engagement. Each of us could be a deeper part of each simcha. We started reading Letters from the Rebbe out loud, followed by discussion of the letters. Combined brain power. Everyone was the student, everyone was the teacher. These discussions evolved into a "to do" list. This list was an empowerment list. Whenever I felt "nothing was happening with my childrens' shidduchim", I could choose something from this "to do list". I was never "powerless to help my children". We went on to read many books on shidduchim. We brought in local speakers and out of town speak...
My brother died suddenly at the age of 22. The first year of my married life I was in denial of my brothers death. My husband wanted me to see a therapist. I didn't agree, a therapist couldn't bring him back to life then nothing could be done. My husband convinced to go to see a grief therapist. I was right she couldn't make him alive again but she led me though the stages of grief. I got on with my life . So, just like I didn't see that their could be help. I think many people are in a place where they could use help and don't know it. That is why I am writing to you. I'm working in shidduchim for 14 years. I see the same shidduchim blockages over and over again. I listed many and asked our mutual friend, if any could be a possibility and it seemed like divorce could be something. She told me a close relatives of yours are divorced. These situations keeps the single "floating". They date, they get close to getting engaged, t...
1. READ AND STUDY LETTERS FROM ETERNAL JOY. 2. GIVE CHARITY TO A NEEDY KALLAH OR TO A FUND THAT HELPS KALLAHS. 3. HELP A KALLAH WITH SOMETHING FOR HER CHASUNAH. 4. ADD TEHILLIM. 6. ADD A LEARNING SEDER 7. ADD A DAVENING. 8. IF YOU ALREADY DAVEN 3 TIMES A DAY, AND ALREADY DO CHITAS, ADD SOMETHING ELSE. 9. GET A BRACHA FROM SOMEONE WHO CARES ABOUT YOU. 10. HAVE A FARBRENGEN, GIVE EVERYONE BROCHOS. 11. SEND THE RESUME TO A SHADCHAN THAT DOESN'T HAVE IT YET. 13. WRITE DOWN 3 THINGS EVERY DAY THAT YOU ARE GRATEFUL FOR UNTIL THE VORT. 14. CALL PEOPLE FROM THE GROUP AND ASK FOR SUGGESTIONS. 15. CALL A SHIDDUCH COACH. 16. GO OVER YOUR LIST WITH YOUR MASHPIA. 18. WORK ON LETTING GO OF GRUDGES, FORGIVENESS. 19. MAKE UP WITH PEOPLE THAT YOU ARE ANGRY WITH. 20. GO TO YOUR RELATIVES GRAVES. 23. BUY SOMETHING FOR THE VORT/L'CHAIM/BRIDAL SHOWER. 24. START MAKING THE GUEST LIST, GET ADDRESSES. 25. START PREPARING THE HOUSE AS IF GUE...
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